The one where she gets a surprise in

her mailbox.  Here’s the story – I’ve been having some personal family challenges in the past couple of months.  My mom is in a nursing home, she has dementia, and about eight weeks ago, my father was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer with spread to his bones and liver.  I’ve been going down to DeQueen about every other weekend, just to be with him and help him out with stuff.  So, to make a long story short, his cancer has spread to his brain and in a week’s time, we’ve had to move him into a nursing home because we just couldn’t provide the care he needed.  Basically, over a six week period, he has gone from being completely independent, driving and living in our family home to having to have nursing care around the clock.  Because of the brain mets, he’s very confused, gets angry and frustrated very easily and has to be supervised closely.  As you might have figured out, all this has been a very trying time for me, and I know I’ve not been my regular self lately.

OK, back to the story about the mail.  I love jellybeans, love them awful and a good friend knows how much I love them, so he put a new bag of Starburst jellybeans in my mailbox.  How sweet is that?  Gave me a big smile and warm fuzzy feeling.  I have wonderful friends.

Susannah modeling the Brittany Jumper.  Cute as cute can be, right?

Is she precious or what???
Never chase a lie.  Let it alone and it will run itself to death.  Lyman Beecher (1775-1863)

The one where she is still

undecided about her next project.  If I was really forward looking and efficient, I’d start on the iPod socks that I’ve decided might be good stocking stuffers for Christmas.  Honestly, though, I can’t think any further ahead than this weekend; again, we’re going to DeQueen to be with my parents and work a little bit, going through things, shredding old paperwork (we found receipts from the 60s) and cleaning out closets.  Lots of memories and it’s so hard to not get sidetracked by old pictures, books and everything else that makes up lives lived and memories kept.  Very emotional.

Heel flap finished and ready to turn –

I hope I’ll have a new WIP Wednesday project next week, keeping my fingers crossed.

The best armor is to keep out of range.  Italian proverb




The one where she doesn’t care

how odd sock toes look when they’re just started.  I need a WIP Wednesday project and this pair of toes is it.  I’ve felt more than a little down today, thinking about what’s going on with my family, Mom and Dad specifically.  It hit me suddenly at Target when I thought looking for a birthday card for the Papoose for her first birthday was a good idea.  So, I was looking at cards and it suddenly dawned on me that Mr. Iknead and I were going to miss her first birthday party because my father was diagnosed last week with lung cancer, pretty advanced we’re told, and I have to make yet another trip to DeQueen to pick him up to bring back to Little Rock (this will be my fourth trip in a week and a half) for an appointment with a radiation oncologist.  Put that on top of Mom’s dementia and her being in a nursing home, I suddenly felt piled upon and had to fight back tears, it’s so hard to have to make a choice between my grandchild and my father.  And I’m fighting tears again.  So, sock toes it is, with a little Josie Pug thrown in.

The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense and life doesn’t.  Joseph L. Mankiewicz (1909-1993)



The one where she thinks she’s

wound about ten miles (at least) of yarn over the past two days.  Actually, I had a couple of skeins that were missing in action and in searching for them I became reacquainted with a lot of my stash.  So, I got out my handy dandy ball winder and swift and wound and wound and wound.  You get the picture.  I had several oh my goodness look at this moments, a lot of them really but on the other hand, I had more than a couple of oh my gosh, what was I thinking moments.  Especially regarding about eight skeins of Cashmerino in about eight different shades of green.  Who knew there were so many shades of avocado?  Yuck.

The Brittany Jumper is blocking.  YAY!   I love the feel of the cotton yarn, which gets softer and softer the more it’s touched but, on the downside, it takes ages to dry, even after running it through the spin cycle a couple of times.  I’ve got it under a fan and that speeds things up a bit, but it’s still slow.  Take a look, please.

Besides being a yarn windfest, it was also a bakefest.  I made a Cream Cheese Blueberry Coffee Cake, a tried and true favorite and also tried something new, a Whole Wheat Fresh Apple Ring.  I learned something new with the apple cake.  It’s nearly impossible for me to shred fresh apple.  It has too much juice or something.  I’m sure some baking whiz can do it with one hand tied behind them, but in my world, it ain’t happening.  I finally just chopped the apple really fine and called it good, and it was.

A Daddy Update:  I’m driving to DeQueen tomorrow after work, he has an appointment at 8:30 a.m. Tuesday with a surgeon, I’m guessing to discuss whether or not surgery is an option.  I’m anxious to hear what he has to say.  I’ll be glad to get this trip and appointment behind us.  This will be the third trip down there since last Sunday.

Still haven’t decided about a new blog, on one hand I enjoy putting my thoughts down on paper (yes, I’m aware that there isn’t paper involved in this blog, but old habits die hard).  On the other hand, lately it’s been very difficult to make time just for this one.  Do I really want to add another?  Could the three kind people who actually read this blog please weigh in?  What do you think?

We are shaped by our thoughts.  We become what we think.  Buddha (563 B.C.-483 B.C.)



The one where she has a burning

desire to learn pottery making.  I’ve always thought it would be really cool to know how to throw pots (I think that’s what it’s called) so I started doing a little research online about classes and lo and behold, the Arkansas Art Center here in Little Rock has classes for just about every art form known to man.  OK, maybe not every art form, I made that up, but they offer a lot of different stuff, painting, pottery, photography and a few things I’ve never heard of.  I never knew how much of a tactile person I am until I started knitting, I love using my hands to create and learn about things.  I’m going for it!

I wind up my work week tomorrow and not a moment too soon.  I’ve felt really tired this week, I think mostly because of my trip to DeQueen last weekend.  I started stressing about it a week beforehand and that, on top of being really busy at work, just wrung me out.  Today was the first day in a couple of weeks that I felt normal, not stressed and not overtired.  I’m too young to feel that old!

Isn’t this amaryllis gorgeous?  DD Lindsey got it three years ago and it’s bloomed every year.  I wish I had a green thumb like she does but that’s what keeps life interesting, different gifts, different people, right?

When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece.  John Ruskin (1819-1900)